It’s My Motherfucking Birthday
That’s right….it is my birthday………….and I HATE BIRTHDAYS……..I haven’t liked them for a long time….don’t worry there is nothing wrong with getting older….but I just hate MY birthday…..mine only……
Your b-day is the day that you should get your way in at least some aspects…….the only thing I got that I wanted was the night off from work…..and I requested it to get it off……..
I spent a lot of time in my own personal hell to realize that I could change it myself…….now that the hell is almost gone, the shadows have shown me that maybe I was better off…….nothing seems to go right anyway……..not for me…………….I just sit back and let life run me over………………I know it’s all my fault, but I’m trying to change it………
But sometimes trying isn’t enough……….
Not without hope…………………..
Not without some clear path………………………….
Not without the fear taking me over…………………………….
Sometimes trying isn’t enough, especially when you want something so bad…………
Don’t get me wrong, I love the shadows, I feel at home in the shadows…………I see things others can’t see while I’m in the shadows………….but it clouds what I can see in myself…………
Most of the time I shake my fist at the sky and tell the world to go fuck itself………………I WILL NOT BE INFLUENCED BY MY SURROUNDINGS………………….but sometimes all that is left is loneliness………………an inate loneliness that you feel when you try and you try and you try and you try and you keep trying………only to find a glass ceiling only about 2 rungs above your head…………………
Why do I hate my birthday?
Simple………………………..
I usually spend it thinking………………..
And when I start thinking……………….
I start realizing all of the things that make the shadows feel like home sweet home………..
You want to know what pain is………………………………pain is finding out all of the worst things on what is supposed to be the best day of your year…………………
F…..U…..C…..K……………………I…..T……………………A…..L…..L
Some things will never change……………….
Fino alla volta prossima, i miei amici………………..
~The Master is Out
–
“Spiteful words can’t hurt your feelings, but silence breaks your heart.”
You’re 24 years old. They say everything goes downhill at 25…I don’t think so only if you let them. Birthdays do suck. Not because of one getting old, I agree, but because…shit, they just suck. What the fuck is so special about a birthday? Corny shit like, one more year we’ve spent with you, This is the day you were born and brightened up my life. Fuck everyone. If I was that important to enyone they wouldn’t wait until this specific day to show me their appreciation. It’s only a farse…a facade…a mask that everyone wears in as scheduled just as society has programmed into them. Because of it, it is something everyone expects you to do for them. Happy belated birthday! I don’t say it because I’m overjoyed you were born but because it’s custom. I don’t know you personally and this is the first time I see your site…I’m testing the waters, but I like what I’ve seen so far and hell, I hope you’re around many more years to keep producing it! Ciao